User:Gabrielajorrin/Christian feminism/Jackson Dutra Peer Review
Peer review
[edit]General info
[edit]- Gabriela Jorrin
- User:Gabrielajorrin/Christian feminism
Lead
[edit]I do not see the lead mentioning about the opposite view being added by my colleague. Perhaps the adding could be interpreted as a counter-argument without needing to be mentioned within the intro.
I agree that they have an excellent introductory sentence that addresses the main article. However, I would suggest that this whole introduction be severely edited to reflect many of the sections that follow in the article.
Content
[edit]In terms of content, I see that the article has a good structure that encompasses history, the main problems related to the theme. Therefore, my colleague adds another part that brings a contrast to the theme, which would help to understand a different perspective in Catholic optics.
Tone and Balance
[edit]I do not see that the article as a whole tends to be biased in one direction. However, I believe that it is necessary to add more information to balance the content in general.
Sources and References
[edit]Basically the entire article offers a quote for each sentence written. I would say that all the work so far is being very well represented with numerous sources that testify to its veracity. Obviously, there are pending issues that will be better addressed when the article reaches a more advanced level in its content.
Organization
[edit]Okay, in this part, I believe it is where significant improvement is needed. Not being an expert on the subject, I had a little difficulty understanding certain things that could have been written more concisely and efficiently to be absorbed.
Images and Media
[edit]I believe that images will enrich the article immensely. Although there are two images attached, they are not enough to improve the written content. Therefore I suggest adding images without a doubt as it will help expand the understanding of the subject addressed.
Overall impressions
[edit]I enjoyed reading Gabriela's edit post, and I think it would potentially add significant insight to the article. I also noticed that she cited several sources for making her sentences reliable, and I think they are useful because they show different perspectives on her argument, which is incredible. However, it may be useful to organize the information a little better. I found some words I would say repetitive. So, I would suggest her trying to use different transition signals to express her thoughts so that the text will flow concisely. Finally, I think it would be good if the last sentence were moved to the top because, in my view, it seems to be an introduction to her short paragraph.