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GA Review

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Reviewer: The UtahraptorTalk/Contribs 23:36, 19 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I will be reviewing this article. My review will be posted within the next few hours. The UtahraptorTalk/Contribs 23:36, 19 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Note: I have not finished my review, but comments are welcome. The UtahraptorTalk/Contribs 23:50, 19 December 2010 (UTC) I have now finished my review. I am placing this article On Hold for one week. If substantial improvements are made to the article within a week, it will pass, otherwise it will fail. The UtahraptorTalk/Contribs 01:22, 20 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Nice work, I'm passing this article. The UtahraptorTalk/Contribs 03:17, 28 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]
1. Clearly written, in good prose with correct spelling and grammar
Lead
  • "The men's lacrosse team will start playing in the newly formed Big East Conference starting in 2010.[10]" - Consider removing the word "starting," as it is redundant. -fixed
Founding
  • "Cornell had been robbed of his wages,[14] not once but twice[15]" - Consider revising to "Cornell had been robbed of his wages twice,..." - fixed
  • "Syracuse also developed "women only" organiztions..." - Fix the spelling of organizations and consider adding a hyphen between women and only; i.e. women-only instead of women only. - fixed
Expansion
  • "...were due to the efforts of two iconic men..." - tone; consider revising to "...were due to the efforts of two men..." - fixed
Modern
  • "In 1956, the School of Social Work was founded which eventually incorporated into the College of Human Ecology.[25]" - Consider revising to "The School of Social Work, which eventually incorporated into the College of Human Ecology, was founded in 1956." - done
Pan Am flight 103
  • "In April 1990 Syracuse University dedicated a memorial wall..." - Consider adding a comma after 1990. - done
Main campus
  • "Three buildings on campus: the Crouse Memorial College and the Hall of Languages, and the Pi Chapter House of Psi Upsilon Fraternity, are individually listed..." - Consider replacing the colon with a hyphen. - done
South campus
  • "After World War II, a large undeveloped hill owned by the university..." - Consider adding a comma after large. - done
  • "...Pavilion, Goldstein Student Center, Skytop Office Building and 621 Skytop Road (for administration) and the InnComplete Pub, a graduate student bar." - Consider adding a comma after the parentheses end. - done
Downtown
  • "The Warehouse also houses a contemporary art space that commissions, exhibits and promotes the work of local and international artists..." - Consider adding a comma after exhibits. - done
  • "The Syracuse Center of Excellence in Environmental and Energy Systems, led by Syracuse University in partnership with Clarkson University and SUNY Environmental Science and Forestry, to create innovations..." - Consider revising to "The Syracuse Center of Excellence in Environmental and Energy Systems, led by Syracuse University in partnership with Clarkson University and SUNY Environmental Science and Forestry, plans to create innovations..." - fixed
  • "It is scheduled to be completed in early 2009.[40]" 2009 has already passed. Has the building been completed yet? - fixed
Art collection
  • "More than 100 important paintings, sculptures and murals are displayed..." - Consider adding a comma after sculptures. - done
  • "...James Earle Fraser's Lincoln, Malvina Hoffman's The Struggle of Elemental Man and Ivan Mestrovic's Moses, Job and Supplicant Persephone." - Consider adding a comma after Man. - done
Organization
  • "The Board of Trustees selects the chancellor and sets her salary." - Is the chancellor always a female? No, reworded.
State University of New York College of Environmental Science and Forestry
  • "The two schools share a common Schedule of Classes, students at both institutions may take courses at the other..." - Consider replacing the comma with a semicolon. - done
  • "...at the beginning of the academic year in August, and joint commencement exercises at in May." - Consider rephrasing to "...at the beginning of the academic year in August, and joint commencement exercises in May." - done
  • "ESF and SU students share access to libraries, recreational facilities, student clubs and other activities..." - Consider adding a comma after clubs. - done
  • "...through a unique relationship between the two schools.[49]" - tone; consider revising to "...through a mutual relationship between the two schools." -done
Academics
  • "The libraries has collectively over 3.16 million volumes.[3]" - Consider replacing the word has with have. -done
Degrees
  • "...in over 200 majors in the 9 undergraduate schools and colleges." - Write out numbers less than 10 (i.e. 2 becomes two, 3 becomes three). -done
  • "The centers are located Beijing, Florence, Italy, Hong Kong, London, UK, Madrid, Spain, Strasbourg, France and Santiago, Chile.[60][61]" - Consider adding a comma after France. - done
National recognition and ranking
  • "Many of SU's programs have been nationally recognized for excellence. A 2008 survey in the Academic Ranking of World Universities places Syracuse University in the top 100 world universities in social sciences.[62]

In 2010, U.S. News & World Report ranked Syracuse number 55 among undergraduate national universities.[63]

The School of Architecture's Bachelor of Architecture program was ranked second nationally in 2010 by the journal DesignIntelligence in its annual edition of "America's Best Architecture & Design Schools."

The industrial design program is ranked 13th nationally by the same 2009 issue of DesignIntelligence." - Consider putting this all together and making one paragraph.

Syracuse University Press
  • "Founded on August 2, 1943 by Chancellor William Pearson Tolley and benefactor Thomas Watson, Sr. The areas of focus for the Press include Middle East Studies, Native American Studies, Peace and Conflict Resolution, Irish Studies and Jewish Studies, among others." - Consider combining these two sentences into one, separating the second from the first with a comma.
University lectures
  • "...redevelopment, human rights, journalism and the environment." - Consider adding a comma after journalism. - done
  • "The University Lectures are supported by the University Trustees, alumni, and friends.[72]" - Consider changing "friends" to "partners". - friends means individual financial donors.
Library
  • "The university also is home to the Belfer Audio Laboratory and Archive..." - Consider revising to "The university is also home to the Belfer Audio Laboratory and Archive..." - done
  • "approximately 540,000 recordings in all formats, primarily cylinders, discs and magnetic tapes." - Consider adding a comma after discs. - done
  • "In July, 2008..." - Remove the comma after July. - done
Research
  • "...and it has international projects the field.[79]" - Consider rephrasing to "...and it has international projects in the field." - done
  • "Other notable research programs are The Syracuse Biomaterials Institute..." - Consider removing the word "notable", and replacing the word "and" with the word "include". - done
Media
  • "CitrusTV produces news, sports and entertainment content..." - Consider adding a comma after sports. - done
  • "and online on the CitrusTV.net Web site and Syracuse.com." - website, not Web site. - done
  • "...with a news and music staff providing programming around the clock." - Try to avoid jargon like "around the clock." Consider revising to "...with a news and music staff providing 24-hour programming." - done
  • "...Ian Eagle, Brian Higgins, Dick Stockton and many others." - Consider adding a comma after Stockton. - done
  • "...operated entirely by students at Syracuse University in New York." - Consider removing New York; it has already been stated that Syracuse University is in New York. - fixed
  • "...and other print publications including..." - Consider adding a comma after publications. - done
Student government
  • "...Syracuse University rules and regulations, by creating a unified student voice." - Consider removing the comma. - done
  • "...a union of several different entities including, Cinema Board..." - Consider removing the comma after including, and placing a comma after entities. - done
  • "...a 20-watt free format radio station WERW 1570 AM and the Promotion Board." - Consider adding a comma after AM. - done
  • "The organization is entirely student-run and operated." - Consider removing "and operated". - fixed
Fraternities and sororities
  • "The first NPHC fraternity, Omega Psi Phi was established..." - Consider adding a comma after Phi. - done
  • "Current National Panhellenic Council Social Sororities at Syracuse University: Alpha Chi Omega..." - Consider rephrasing to "Current National Panhellenic Council Social Sororities and Syracuse University include Alpha Chi Omega..." - done
  • "Current Members of the Interfraternity Council at Syracuse University: Acacia..." - Consider rephrasing to "Current members of the Interfraternity Council at Syracuse University include Acacia..." - done
Athletics
  • "One of the notable accomplishments is the men's basketball team's 2003 NCAA championship under long-time head coach Jim Boeheim, who has guided his team to seven Big East regular season championships, five Big East Tournament championships, and 25 NCAA Tournament appearances." - This sounds a bit promotional to me. Consider rephrasing to "An accomplishment by a sports team is the men's basketball team's 2003 NCAA championship under coach Jim Boeheim. Under Boeheim, the team has been to seven Big East regular season championships, five Big East Tournament championships, and 25 NCAA Tournament appearances." - fixed
  • "...victory over the Kansas Jayhawks gave them their first ever national championship..." - Consider removing the word ever. - fixed
  • "It would win USILA championships in 1922, 1924 and 1925." - Consider adding a comma after 1924. - fixed
  • "Syracuse has won the past 2 men's Div..." - Write out the 2. - done
Alumni
  • "...Joyce Carol Oates, John D. MacDonald, Shirley Jackson and Alice Sebold..." - Consider adding a comma after Jackson. - done
  • "...William Safire, Pulitzer Prize winning commentator;Cambridge historian..." - Add a space between the semicolon and Cambridge. - done
  • "...Peter Falk, Aaron Sorkin, Taye Diggs and Vanessa L. Williams." - Consider adding a comma after Diggs. - done
  • "Rock star Lou Reed." - Fragment sentence; consider rephrasing to "Rock star Lou Reed is also an alumnus from Syracuse University." - done
  • "Jillian Wheeler, American singer-songwriter and actress attended Syracuse University..." - Consider adding a comma after actress. - done
  • "...for one academic year, she later transferred to Northeastern University in Boston." - Consider replacing the comma with a semicolon. - done
2. Factually accurate
  • References one, 10, 40, 62, 64 are deadlinks. This should be fixed.
  • I cannot access reference 93.
After renumbering, current dead link report shows 42 - which I will fix as soon as the wayback machine comes back into service.
  • Other than that everything looks good. There are no {{citation needed}} templates that I can see.
3. No original research
  • Looks fine to me.
4. Broad in coverage of the topic without unnecessary digressions
  • Looks fine to me.
5. Written from a neutral point of view
  • There's various bits and pieces of promotional talk throughout the article, but it's nothing that's not easily fixed.
6. Stable, with no ongoing edit wars
  • Some vandalism, but it's cleaned up quickly. No recent edit wars.
7. Compliant with image use policy
  • File:Annual Class of Syracuse University, July 1876, from Robert N. Dennis collection of stereoscopic views.jpg needs an author.
Robert Dennis was a stereoscopic image collector, not a photographer. He did not record the photographer's name, and the New York Public Library who maintains the collection does not know who took the photograph either. Because the image is more than 125 years old, it is in the public domain.
  • File:SCrane2.JPG needs an author. - removed
  • File:HendricksChapel.jpg needs a better description, and it also needs an author. - caption expanded author unknown
  • Other than that, images look good. Licenses are all in order.

Thank you for taking the time to do the review. We still start working on the above concerns. It may take a few more days, because I will be traveling for Christmas. Racepacket (talk) 23:18, 20 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]