Talk:Peruchazhi/GA1
GA Review
[edit]GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 14:52, 3 March 2016 (UTC)
Will do this soon. JAGUAR 14:52, 3 March 2016 (UTC)
Initial comments
[edit]- "The film originally written in Tamil" - Originally written in Tamil, the film
- Done
- The middle two paragraphs in the lead definitely need to be merged into one
- Done
- "The film is about how Jagannathan a young politician from India" - how about The film revolves around Jagannathan, a young politician from India and his transition to chief political adviser or something like that. The sentence has no breaks and is very choppy
- Done
- United States is linked twice in lead
- Done
- "Sunny is forced to consult a third person's advise and calls Francis Kunjappan" - sounds like an actual third person here. How about Sunny is forced to consult advice from a third person and calls Francis Kunjappa
- Done
- "US" is linked twice in the Plot. The first instance of "US" should be changed to just "United States", and the second "US" delinked
- Done
- "They gives a message to Sunny" - give
- Done
- " but is not revealed that from where he got it" - I don't get this. Is it meant to be like but it is not revealed where he got it?
- This means, it is not revealed on that scene, it is later shown on climax scene when, Jagannathan calls Sunny and reveals backstage dramas which occurred last night.
- "Meanwhile, Jagannathan and his pals returns to India" - informal. Use 'friends'
- Done
- "About the unique title, "The term Peruchazhi" - a colon is needed instead of a comma
- Done
- Europe is linked twice in the Release section. Does it even need to be linked?
- Done
- " in google play store in September 2014" - needs capitalisation
- Done
- "which the makers claims to be the first of its kind marketing method" - choppy. How about in which the film's makers claim to be the first of its kind in marketing
- Done
- The first paragraph in Soundtrack is unsourced
- Done
There are some prose issues and some confusing sentences, but once they're all addressed this could have a chance at meeting the criteria. JAGUAR 19:10, 3 March 2016 (UTC)
Comments from Kailash
[edit]- The filming and marketing sections may be split if possible.
- The refs need great cleanup.
- There can be more categories.
- "The Oscar nominee Bombay Jayashri had sung a song" - How relevant is that in "Casting"? Besides, the fact that she is an Oscar nominee should removed per WP:PUFFERY.
- All sources' authors must be in "Last name, first name" format. Some sources lack access date.
There are just some of the issues I cannot let the GA review overlook. More will come soon. Kailash29792 (talk) 11:08, 4 March 2016 (UTC)
Close - not listed
[edit]Kailash's comments haven't been addressed, and I think this is far off from meeting the criteria. I was very lenient on Bangalore Days, and I can't afford to do that again. Can you renominate it when it meets the criteria? JAGUAR 17:03, 7 March 2016 (UTC)