A fact from Patagosaurus appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 23 September 2014 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
Did you know... that Patagosaurus is a genus of sauropod dinosaur from Patagonia that is known from an almost complete skeleton and partial skull?
This article is within the scope of WikiProject Palaeontology, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of palaeontology-related topics and create a standardized, informative, comprehensive and easy-to-use resource on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.PalaeontologyWikipedia:WikiProject PalaeontologyTemplate:WikiProject PalaeontologyPalaeontology
This article is within the scope of WikiProject Dinosaurs, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of dinosaurs and dinosaur-related topics on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.DinosaursWikipedia:WikiProject DinosaursTemplate:WikiProject Dinosaursdinosaurs
This article is part of WikiProject Argentina, an attempt to expand, improve and standardise the content and structure of articles related to Argentina. If you would like to participate, you can improve Patagosaurus, or sign up and contribute to a wider array of articles like those on our to do list.ArgentinaWikipedia:WikiProject ArgentinaTemplate:WikiProject ArgentinaArgentine
For some reason I'm the only person who seems to review dinosaur articles (not to mention rock music articles) as of recently, but I tend to wait so others can get the chance, so I won't "hog" them. But well, this one has waited enough, I guess... Some preliminary comments below. FunkMonk (talk) 17:08, 11 November 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Info about referred specimens and such should be under history rather than description.
Done
Also, I'd merge the skull subsection with the text above it under description, since it is so short anyway. That will also prevent the image from clashing with the subheader.
Done
Could be nice to note what museum the taxobox image is from. I uploaded the image myself, but couldn't find the info on Flickr...
"Many specimens of the taxon were all found" Would be good to write the name of the subject in the first sentence of the article, also "all found" seems redundant, I'd remove all...
done. Also reworded to portray intended meaning.
"It can be distinguished from Cetiosaurus, a similar genus, by features of the ischium and vertebrae" Isn't this more relevant under classification or some such?
Moved
"Over twelve specimens have been referred to the species" Earlier you write only a dentary has been referred, what is correct?
Corrected
Also, I'd probably collect all the referred specimen info in the paragraph at the end of the section, which already has this as its focus.
Moved
"He named for them the genus Patagosaurus, as well as its type species P. fariasi." An odd sentence, I'd think he based the taxon on the fossils, and that the taxon is what was named?
Reworded
The sentence about the name meaning oddly hangs by itself, would make more sense right after the part where you mention the coining of the binomial.
Moved
"Patagosaurus is a more generalised sauropod" Doesn't mean anything to most people if you don't state compared to what.
Reworded
"although juveniles are known to be much smaller in size" Isn't that so obvious as to be redundant? Does the source say this?
Removed
"Patagosaurus is almost completely known, with many articulated specimens found covering almost all of the skeleton, including parts of the skull." Would also seem to belong under discovery.
Moved and reworded
Remember that wikilinks should be used at the first mention of a word, not at later mentions.
"with a recent revision by Oliver Rahut identifying only a few jaws are certainly referrable to it" What is identified here? "Determining" would make more sense.
Reworded
"are similar generally to" Isn't it more common to say generally similar?
Changed
"Starting from the very end of the first vertebrae" Singular, so should be "first vertebra".
Changed
There are words in almost every sentence of the postcranial skeleton section that most readers would be unfamiliar, try to simplify, wikilink, and explain as much as you can.
I think I got them all
Several features are referred to as "unique", without the text explaining why. Unique compared to what?
Explained
"as they become thinner and thinner the farther from the scapulae" Why "thinner and thinner" and not something like "gradually thinner"?
Changed
I miss a general description of the animal. The average reader would have no idea how this animal looked like by reading all the anatomical minutiae. "Generalised bauplan" means little to nothing, you need some more explanation. Was it four legged? Did it have a long neck and tail? As simple as that.
I think the changes are good, and it is almost there, I'll comment on the rest of the article now, and when those issues are fixed, it should be good to go. FunkMonk (talk) 12:58, 15 November 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Anything that suggests what kind of plants this animal ate? Tooth morphology?
Not much on teeth, what is available is added
Derived and primitive need explanation or links.
Linked
"finding Patagosaurus as a cetiosaurid." Maybe add "again"?
Added
"and cetiosaurines were the only true cetiosaurids. Upchurch found Patagosaurus, Cetiosaurus and Amygdalodon to be the only cetiosaurids" Repeating essentially the same info in two sentences, could be merged.
Merged
"They found that Patagosaurus was in fact not a sister taxon of Cetiosaurus" Seems they also obliterated cetiosauridae? Should be noted.
Added
Not sure why Fauna should be separated form palaeoecology. The sections are so small, and fauna is part of ecology anyhow.
removed subheader, kept paragraphs separate
"Patagosaurus is from" Was found/discovered in sounds more accurate.
Corrected
"In fact, "the fossil record" Direct quotes and claims need attribution in the text.
Added attribution, first name unknown
"The Cañadon Asfalto Formation, which existed about" It still exists, it is dated to have been formed/representing that time.
Was deposited
"and dinosaurs." Since it would had interacted with other dinosaurs, you could mention which are known from there.
Mentions in the next sentence of the paragraph
The lead is shorter than usual, which is good, but there is no overall description of the animal, only anatomical minutiae. You wouldn't know what the animal looked like if there weren't images!
