Talk:Federated States of Micronesia at the 2008 Summer Olympics/GA1
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Reviewer: Good888 (talk · contribs) 09:58, 2 November 2014 (UTC)
Well, I reviewed Djibouti at the 2008 Summer Olympics a couple of weeks ago, so I might as well review this one as well.
Lead section
- "The Federated States of Micronesia sent a team of five athletes to compete at the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing, China."- Perhaps you could add a source here?
- "The appearance of the delegation marked the third appearance by a Micronesian team at the Olympics since its debut at the 2000 Summer Olympics in Sydney, Australia."- Another source here would be useful.
- "At the ceremonies, Minginfel held the Micronesian flag for the third time."- Many issues here. Sounds as if he carried the flag for BOTH ceremonies, which is incorrect. Also it should state that he was selected as flag bearer rather than held. And finally, a source here and a link to List of flag bearers for the Federated States of Micronesia at the Olympics as well please.
Background
- "The Federated States of Micronesia sent its first delegation to participate in the Olympics approximately 14 years after it became a sovereign entity, sending three men and two women to the 2000 Summer Olympics in Sydney, Australia."- Source here please.
Athletics
- Like I suggested in the Djibouti at the 2008 Summer Olympics, merge the Men's and Women's sections together.
- "In a heat led by Qatar's Samuel Adelebari Francis"- Samuel Adelebari Francis is a red link. Link to Samuel Francis (athlete) instead.
- "During the qualification round of the event on August 14, Howard competed against seven other athletes."- I think this should be rewritten similar to this: "Howard competed in heat seven against seven other athletes in the qualification round of the event on August 14.
- "He finished the race in 11.03 seconds, ranking seventh in his heat." Source should be added here.
- "He placed ahead of Gordon Heather of the Cook Islands (11.41 seconds) and immediately behind Sebastien Gattuso of Monaco (10.70 seconds) in a heat led by Qatar's Samuel Adelebari Francis (10.40 seconds) and Trinidadian runner Marc Burns (10.46 seconds)"- Rewrite to Cook Islands's Gordon Heather, Monaco's Sebastien Gattuso and Trinidad and Tobago's Marc Burns.
- "Overall, 80 competitors took part in the qualification round of the event. Howard ranked 66th."- Add that 41 competitors qualified and that Howard ranked 66th, 25 positions behind.
- "Ikelap competed in the nine-person ninth heat."- Perhaps you could rewrite this to: "Ikelap competed in heat nine against eight other athletes"
- "She finished the race in 13.73 seconds, ending in eighth place." Add a source here please.
- "Laotian runner Philaylack Sackpaseuth ranked immediately behind Ikelap"- We know Sackpaseuth is a runner. Rewrite to "Lao's Philaylack Sackpaseuth ranked immediately behind Ikelap"
- "and Barbadian athlete Jade Bailey"- Read above. "and Barbados's Jade Bailey"
- "She did not advance to later rounds."- Can you rewrite this? It's a repetition of "He did not advance to later rounds." in the previous paragraph.
Swimming
- "Hadley finished fifth, displacing John Kamyuka of Botswana (25.54 seconds) but falling behind Andrey Molchanov of Turkmenistan (25.02 seconds)."- Source here please.
- Note that Debra Daniel was the youngest Federated States of Micronesia athlete that Olympics in this section.
- "She finished in 30.61 seconds, placing fifth."- Source here please.
- "She did not advance to later rounds." - It's a repetition of "He did not advance to later rounds" in the previous paragraph. Rewrite to "Therefore Daniel did not advance to later rounds" or something similar.
Weightlifting
- Instead of an image of Manuel Minginfel, add an image of where his event took place.
- "Minginfel was 21 years old when he first competed at the 2000 Summer Olympics in Sydney, Australia."- Source here.
- "Minginfel finished in his event when at the 2004 Summer Olympics in Athens, Greece, at 25 years old."- Source here as well.
References
- Link both ESPN and Sports-Reference.
Alot of issues this time, but I think you can fix most of these quite easily. Placing it on hold for now. good888 (talk) 09:58, 2 November 2014 (UTC)
- @Good888:
All done - NG39 (Used to be NickGibson3900)Talk 08:57, 3 November 2014 (UTC)
- @NG39: OK, promoting to GA class. Good work. good888 (talk) 09:32, 3 November 2014 (UTC)