Talk:Deven Parekh

Edit Request

Hello editors,

Per my original request on Talk:Insight Partners, I am employed by Insight Partners and have a COI regarding this draft for one of our executives. I am hoping to get assistance to address the concerns that this page currently reads like an advertisement. Any improvements that can be made by editors who have contributed to this and/or the Insight Partners article in the past would be much appreciated: Hatchens, FeldBum, Nomadicghumakkad, Jehochman, Scruss, Salsakesh, Metromemo.

I have some thoughts on edits that may accomplish this, but would very much appreciate validation and any other feedback from neutral editors before resubmitting:

• Shorten the lede by removing the phrase "known for being the largest Indian American individual donor to Hillary Clinton’s 2016 presidential campaign"
• Updates to Private Sector section:
  • Reduce verbiage around background:
    • Current: "Parekh began his career at The Blackstone Group where he was involved in M&A advisory. After Blackstone, he was a principal at Berenson Minella & Company, a New York based merchant banking firm where he served on the firm’s M&A Committee from 1992-2000. Parekh joined Insight Partners, formerly known as Insight Venture Partners, in 2000."
    • Proposed Trimming: "Parekh began his career at The Blackstone Group and Berenson Minella & Company before joining Insight Partners (formerly known as Insight Venture Partners) in 2000."
  • Trim the list of investments to just Twitter, Alibaba, Calm, Saks.com, and move Checkout.com from list of investments to list of board seats
  • Reduce verbiage around accolades:
    • Current: Parekh was selected to the Forbes Midas List, a list of venture capitalists that have demonstrated high returns via IPO capitalization, from 2014 through 2018, and ranked 36 on the 2018 list. He was a top 100 venture capitalist in 2016 and 2018, as selected by business analytics provider CB Insights.
    • Proposed Trimming: Parekh was selected to the Forbes Midas List from 2014 through 2018.
• Updates to Public Sector section:
  • Clean up phrasing around this award to the following: "In July 2021, Parekh was named one of four winners of the 2021 Robert F. Kennedy Human Rights Awards, also known as the Ripple of Hope award, alongside politician and voting rights advocate Stacey Abrams."
• Updates to Board Positions section:
  • Combine sentences:
    • Current: "From 2007 to 2012, Parekh served as chairman of the board of Publicolor, a nonprofit that focuses on inner city schools in New York City. He was previously a member of the board of trustees and executive committee for the Ethical Culture Fieldston School."
    • Proposed: "From 2007 to 2012, Parekh served as chairman of the board of Publicolor, and was previously a member of the board of trustees and executive committee for the Ethical Culture Fieldston School."

Thanks again.

Sincerely,

MollyInsight (talk) 20:55, 1 September 2021 (UTC)

Hey, appreciate the honesty MollyInsight. I have few inputs on what you have proposed that might also help build perspective on WP:NPOV. Also, I want to highlight that this was an AFC accepted article and my move it to draftspace was not right. I should have consulted the AFC reviewer first (I would expect this if someone is moving my accepted article to drafts). So I am apologising for this; and you do have rights to simply moving back to mains pace which will leave me with the option to nominate it for AFD. I am stating this because process should be followed and I feel bad that I wasn't careful enough. Now that this is off my chest, I will soon leave my inputs on this.

Also want to check with other tagged other editors if they feel that the topic is surely notable or not. Nomadicghumakkad (talk) 00:42, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

Thanks very much for your help Nomadicghumakkad. Looking forward to your additional perspective, and any other editors' feedback that can help me more clearly establish both notability and a neutral POV.

MollyInsight (talk) 18:26, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

I'm not as concerned with notability here. I think that's established on the draft between the political stuff (fundraising and position) and the career details, but the draft still comes off as promotional. Let me see what I can do to reduce that. Your suggestions, MollyInsight, seem like a good start. As Nomadicghumakkad noted, this was a weird process, but I agree that he's right that this draft needs more work before it should be submitted. --FeldBum (talk) 15:00, 3 September 2021 (UTC)

Hi MollyInsight, I think what you are suggesting will improve WP:NPOV. I feel any of us just try our hand to de-jewel this article and see what all aligns with you. About board memberships - I personally feel they are not relevant at all unless the contribution as a board member is explained. If such positions are honorary or ceremonial or to fulfil the company compliances, best to avoid. Again, it's a personal opinion. Others may feel differently. Nomadicghumakkad (talk) 02:23, 4 September 2021 (UTC)

Hi everyone, as this is currently a draft, an edit request is not necessary. I am closing this request as answered so that it does not appear in the edit request queue. I suggest that editors continue this conversation and submitted to WP:AfC when it is ready. Thanks. Z1720 (talk) 23:53, 5 September 2021 (UTC)

Hi MollyInsight, FeldBum, Nomadicghumakkad --

I thought it might help the draft refining process to make MollyInsight's suggested edits and see where that leaves things. I agree that it's a good start, as it removes some of the more bluntly promotional phrasing. Per Nomadicghumakkad, perhaps the next step is to take a closer look at the board memberships? Otherwise it feels close to ready.

Best, Mrmctorso (talk) 18:02, 17 September 2021 (UTC)

Hey Mrmctorso , I am okay with whatever path others agree to take. Happy to spend some more time in next couple of days and take a closer look. Nomadicghumakkad (talk) 01:05, 18 September 2021 (UTC)

Hi editors (Nomadicghumakkad, Mrmctorso, FeldBum, Hatchens):

I would like to move this article back out of draftspace. I am hoping that the edits made in recent weeks will be seen as sufficient to alleviate past concerns about WP:NPOV. Do any of you have additional concerns or areas you recommend be addressed first?

Thank you,

MollyInsight (talk) 13:20, 6 October 2021 (UTC)

Hi MollyInsight, in my opinion the article is in a good spot to submit again. I'm sure additional refinements can be made, but I think the primary areas of concern are much improved now.

Mrmctorso (talk) 14:59, 12 October 2021 (UTC)

Draft Updates - June 2022

Hi everyone,

As noted previously, I am employed by Insight Partners and have a COI regarding this draft.

I have taken some time and outside input to revisit the article, and I am now asking for additional feedback and suggestions from editors who have contributed in the past before resubmitting: Nomadicghumakkad, FeldBum, Z1720, Mrmctorso, Hatchens, Eternal_Shadow.

The most significant edits compared to the previous version highlight Deven Parekh's philanthropic recognition, as recognized via his 2021 RFK Human Rights award (see: http://en.wiki.x.io/wiki/Robert_F._Kennedy_Human_Rights_Award#Ripple_of_Hope_Award) - and in particular the founding of the Parekh Center for Interdisciplinary Neurology at NYU Langone (https://med.nyu.edu/centers-programs/parekh-interdisciplinary-neurology/). Sources that discuss this include https://www.crainsnewyork.com/technology/insight-partners-investor-deven-parekh-talks-new-yorks-growing-tech-scene.

I welcome any additional feedback as I continue to aim to make this page Wikipedia-ready.

Thanks very much, MollyInsight (talk) 19:50, 1 June 2022 (UTC)

Hi MollyInsight,

I've made some small updates to your citations where I think they'll be helpful toward establishing notability. I'd say the context you've added around his philanthropic work is quite helpful as well. While I personally think this is sufficient, other more experienced editors have clearly viewed this subject more critically in the past, so you may want to seek further opinions before resubmitting.

Best,

Mrmctorso (talk) 15:31, 17 June 2022 (UTC)

Notability Tag Removal Discussion - August 2022

Thanks to all the editors who have helped me improve this page to the point of publication (FeldBum, Nomadicghumakkad, Mrmctorso, Missvain). I understand that our improved references were able to help allay the previous editorial concerns about Deven Parekh's notability.

Since we were able to meet that bar to get this page published, is it now possible to also remove the notability tag at the top of the page? This dates back to June 2021, before the article references were improved to address these concerns. I am hoping to achieve consensus that this tag is no longer necessary.

Much appreciated, MollyInsight (talk) 16:59, 10 August 2022 (UTC)

Seeing this note from a few months ago. Seems to me the sourcing is sufficiently improved to drop the banner, and as no one else appears to be contesting I have made the edit.

Mrmctorso (talk) 15:50, 4 November 2022 (UTC)