Talk:Crimson-headed partridge/GA1
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Reviewer: Amitchell125 (talk · contribs) 14:09, 24 June 2022 (UTC)
Happy to review the article.
Review comments
[edit]Lead section / infobox
[edit]- Link francolin (here and in the first section).
- Done.
- The link to Described unexpectedly goes to Species description. Consider amending the sentence to ‘The species was described by the British ornithologist Richard Bowdler Sharpe in 1879. It is the only species... .’
- Linking "described" to species description is standard across WP bird articles and seems clear enough, with the alternate rewording clunky and unnecessary. eg black-breasted buttonquail, white-headed fruit dove, and black-and-yellow broadbill, the three most recent bird FAs, all use it (although I did write two of them).
- Understood, and thanks. Is there anything out there to help guide non-bird specialists like me from tripping up again in the future? Amitchell125 (talk) 16:18, 30 June 2022 (UTC)
- in the genus Haematortyx – I’m unclear why Haematortyx is in bold here.
- As the CHP is the only species in the genus, the genus is also the subject of the article.
a striking appearance, with – this phrase may need to be removed, as striking sounds like an opinion. The word also appears in the main body.
- The dictionary definition of streaking is "attracting attention by reason of being unusual, extreme, or prominent", which this species arguably fulfills. In any case, it's backed by the source, with Madge and McGowan 2010 calling it a "A striking black and crimson jungle partridge".
- OK, but readers (who, like me, might be suspicious of subjective adjectives in encyclopaedia articles) could be reassured if you mentioned Madge and McGowan as the authors of the description. Amitchell125 (talk) 16:22, 30 June 2022 (UTC)
- I would replace one of the photographs with this illustration by Gould.
- Done.
- The species feeds on - amend to ‘Crimson-headed partridges feed on’ (it’s a Wikipedia thing to refer to the topic within paragraphs such as this).
- Not necessary, the paragraph only needs to start with a noun. Starting each paragraph with "crimson-headed partridge" would get repetitive. Fr other example see Black-and-red broadbill and Chestnut-hooded laughingthrush.
- More than happy to concur. Amitchell125 (talk) 16:51, 30 June 2022 (UTC)
- It has a population of 1,000–10,000 total individuals and 670–6,700 mature birds which is currently thought to be declining. Avoid currently (MOS:RELTIME). To improve the prose I would amend the sentence to something like ‘The population of 1,000–10,000 individuals and 670–6,700 mature birds is thought to be declining.’.
- Reworded.
- Unlink crimson (common word).
- Done.
1 Taxonomy and systematics
[edit]- Introduce Rebecca Kimball.
- Added.
2 Description
[edit]- Amend the caption to say which country Kinabalu Park is located in.
- Done for next image, as this one has been removed.
- (minor point) – Consider moving the image to the left, as it risks being dislocated by the infobox.
- Done.
3 Distribution and habitat
[edit]- Link kerangas forest (omitting heath, and keeping kerangas in italics).
- Don't see a reason to, keeping it as it is gives readers some additional context without needing to click links.
- Agreed. AM
4 Behaviour and ecology
[edit]- There no need to link Kinabalu Park is this caption as well.
- See above.
On hold
[edit]I'm putting this neat little article on hold for a week until 4 July to allow time for the issues raised to be addressed. Regards, Amitchell125 (talk) 16:12, 26 June 2022 (UTC)
Passing now
[edit]The article is well into the realms of GA territory, so passing now. Regards, Amitchell125 (talk) 19:43, 30 June 2022 (UTC)