Draft talk:Vandalism of Ruby Deluxe Bar
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[edit]I would develop your intro a little more. Looking at one of your sources, it seemed that the police were claiming that they were firing to disperse a riot, and I think that classification is important context here. The “fleeing party” doesn’t give me enough of an understanding that they were fleeing because the cops demanded they do so, or who the “they” is, ie that it was the business owner fleeing. Add a citation to the intro.
Develop the claim that “It is no secret that queer spaces are closing”. Why and how are they closing? Are they targeted by groups in a community, individuals in government, media? I do love the background insight into the importance of gay bars to the community.
In re: “vandalism”: I would include some sort of info like the police were claiming that this protest was an unlawful assembly that had escalated into a riot. Did this claim originate from the “anonymous call made prior”?
“Importance” section is strong. RebekkahMcGrath (talk) 19:01, 24 February 2024 (UTC)
Intro- Maybe try to add a little bit more context, also do you know the name of the white supremacist group?
Background- I'm sure if the first sentence fits as is, the beginning of this section almost sounds like an argument rather than just providing information if that makes sense (end of this section looks good with the court case).
Vandalism- I know this was a pretty recent occurrence so I know there isn’t a ton of scholarship on it, but again maybe this section could be fleshed out a little further if at all possible.
Importance and See Also sections look good — Preceding unsigned comment added by Bjurgens14 (talk • contribs) 16:27, 1 March 2024 (UTC)
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