User:Oliversbeard
The first photographic evidence to support the myth was taken in The Patterson-Gimlin film of 1967 whereby it was captured meandering into local forrestry.
Some have reported sightings off the coast of tasmania and as far a field as japan. No one quite knows nor fully appreciates the importance of these sightings, rumour has it that following each of these occurances a social change ensued or greater step in our understanding of the world around us. Alexander the Great (356-323 BC) built an empire from Greece to India before dying of natural causes at age 33. Reports tell us he was guided by a bearded man. Isaac Newton (1643-1727) published the Principia where he developed the three laws of motion, demonstrated the structure of the universe, the movement of the planets, and calculated the mass of the heavenly (bearded) bodies.
Olivers beard got it's big break in showbiz starring alongside Alec Guiness in Star Wars, a role he carried off so well he was nomintated, but did not win, the accolade "Most Outstanding Performance In A Feature Film" (aka a "Beardy" at the annual "Beards Around The World Unite" Awards held that year in Alabama, USA.
In 1972, a crack Bearded unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. This Beard promptly escaped a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, he survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find him... then maybe you can hire, Olivers beard!