Talk:Witch trials in early modern Scotland/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Adam Cuerden (talk · contribs) 00:53, 18 July 2013 (UTC) Just a preliminary note before I start: If you're local, do you know there's a plaque about witchtrials just outside of the Edinburgh Castle car park thing (where they make the stands for the festival). Just head east out of that area, and look at the side of - think it's the Camera Obscura building, might be Timberland Tours. Anyway, right at the start of the buildings there. I think it's meant to be a fountain, like a lot f fountains, its not on, though. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 00:53, 18 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for taking this on. Sadly I am not local, but I will definitely check it out next time I am in town.--SabreBD (talk) 08:49, 18 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I apologise for the delay. Expect a full review by tomorrow morning. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 19:44, 30 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

No problem, but I should say that after tomorrow I will be on a wikibreak and so any changes I cannot done in time will have to wait a week.--SabreBD (talk) 20:00, 30 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

...Well, that makes me feel a bit better about what happens to me the day after tomorrow. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 20:11, 30 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Anyway, let's begin.

Lead

"Seventy-five per cent of the accused were women, with over 1,500 executed." - the structure of that implies that there were 1,500 women executed. I don't think that's the intent, but don't want to edit without checking.

Done Yep that is the total estimate.--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

It would probably be worth briefly explaining the Commonwealth for those not familiar with the English Civil War. Also, does that entirely count as English occupation? it might be better to be more specific like "occupation by Cromwell's forces during and after the English Civil War.

Done--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I have also clarified "British parliament", since we're floating so near the date of unification. Perhaps unnecessarily. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 20:23, 30 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Legal origins

"However, these political cases may have been declining in the first half of the sixteenth century.[2] While popular belief in magic was widespread in the Middle Ages, theologians had been generally sceptical, and lawyers only interested in prosecuting cases in which harm from magic was evident, but from the late fifteenth century attitudes changed and witches were seen as deriving powers from the Devil, arguably making witches a form of heresy." A little disjointed, and the "may" is a bit unqualified.

Done--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Role of James VI

It may be better to use the "James VI and I" form, for the advantage of English readers.

He wasn't James I at this point and that is the form used in the main article link.--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Oh, yeah, I'm forgetting the point in tine we're looking at. Sorry. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 10:56, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"the storms he encountered on his voyage came to be seen as the result of magic." - came to be seen by whom?

Done Him.--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Nature of the trials

Repeat of an issue in the lead: "Seventy-five per cent of the accused were women, with over 1,500 executed." - the structure of that implies that there were 1,500 women executed. I don't think that's the intent, but don't want to edit without checking.

Done--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Decline

I'd give a bit more of an explanation of the English Civil War here. It's the background to most of what happens in this section.

Done--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Sheriff's courts were re-established and Justices of the Peace returned in 1656" - It might be worth explaining why. This is before the end of the Commonwealth.

Done--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"The last recorded executions were in 1706 and the last trial in 1727." It may be worth going into these in slightly more detail, if it's not irrelevant.

Done as far as I can. Some less reliable sources give a name, but I would have to check that.--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Causes

"particularly in the reformed kirk," - We probably needs a brief explanation of "reformed kirk".

Done--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

General thoughts

The standard of writing in this is pretty good - GA level, certainly, but I'd suggest getting a copyeditor in before going for FA. Nothing too specific or major, it's just a little bit more inelegant in places than it needs to be.
It would probably be worth summarising some of the notable trials. At least one or two, as examples. At the moment, this article lacks any examples whatsoever.

A pretty good article, but could use a little work still. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 20:43, 30 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Many thanks for this. I think that this is probably all I can do at the moment, but I will bear in mind some of the suggestions, particularly about examples.--SabreBD (talk) 10:39, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I'll give it a full re-review later on, and see if I think the examples are necessary to GA, or if they can wait until after. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 10:57, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I added a section on belief that includes several notable examples.--SabreBD (talk) 20:15, 17 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Hmm. I don't think the article is perfect, but it's looking damn good. Pass, and thanks for the extra work. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 16:38, 20 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]