Talk:Vidya Balan/GA1
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Reviewer: Dwaipayanc (talk · contribs) 15:40, 30 September 2012 (UTC)
Review comments
[edit]Hi! I will do the review. The article looks pretty good. The references looks ok, although there are a few inconsistencies (which is not a problem for GA). Some random small mistakes in the prose were also noted. I am mentioning a few of those below:
- P.R. Balan, her father, is the Vice President of etc now. But when she was born, etc was non-existent. So, you should add that the father is vp now, or tell what was he at the time of birth.
- second paragraph of the lead begins with the pronoun she. A new paragraph should not begin with a pronoun, tell her name.
- "... Encouraged her too complete her education..." It should be "to complete".
If I find any such minor problems, I will fix those myself. If there is any major issue, of course will mention here. Regards.--Dwaipayan (talk) 15:40, 30 September 2012 (UTC)
- "Balan next appeared in a leading role in Sajid Khan's comedy Heyy Babyy as Isha Sahni, a deceived, single mother". What is a deceived mother? It either needs more explanation, or (in case explanation is lengthy) removal.
- "The film which also featured Akshay Kumar, Ritesh Deshmukhand Fardeen Khan emerged as a box-office success with a worldwide gross of 83.68 crore (US$15.82 million),[27], but critics were negative about ...". An extra comma after the superscript.
- "while performing a street play by the same name in 1989" You mean the play was named Halla Bol, right?
- Yeah, changed it to a "street play of the same name".
- " was listed as "India's hottest vegetarian" by a poll conducted by PETA". Which year?
- "for two consecutive years (2010-11)". Should be endash.--Dwaipayan (talk) 14:29, 1 October 2012 (UTC)
- the lead mentions that she lives with parent at Khar. But this info is not mentioned in the text of the article.
- Mentioned.
- the lead has two terms within quotation marks. Ornamental roles and female hero. These should be mentioned in the text also with citation. I understand that the text has other wordings that convey similar meaning , with citation. Howev, since you are quoting those two terms from somewhere, you should include the exact terms with citations, in the text.
- The quote "female hero" is linked and cited in the "Media image and artistry" section. Removed the quotation mark for ornamental characters.
- Just for the sake of update, I saw that in Kahaani article, an editor made some edits today regarding the sequel. The director has mentioned that Balan will star in the sequel. If you think the source is reliable, you can update here in future projects. However, this is not that much important. --Dwaipayan (talk) 17:22, 1 October 2012 (UTC)
- Yeah, but the film is still in the scripting process, so I decided not to include it just yet. --S.M.A.R.O.J.I.T (talk) 03:51, 2 October 2012 (UTC)
Review list
[edit]- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (references):
b (citations to reliable sources):
c (OR):
- a (references):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects):
b (focused):
- a (major aspects):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Pass/Fail: