Talk:Vanille/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Tintor2 (talk · contribs) 23:41, 7 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Passing review.Tintor2 (talk) 03:34, 8 July 2023 (UTC) I'll be reviewing this article this weekend. It looks passable but I have yet to fully read it.Tintor2 (talk) 23:41, 7 July 2023 (UTC) Well, let's go by the first sections:[reply]

Is verifiability really needed in an infobox? I would only reference it if it was controversial information.
I've had editors complain when such content wasn't referenced, a few times during GAN. It's turned into "better safe than sorry"

Lead

Since it's the character's introduction I'd suggest adding the mention, "also addressed simply as Vanille".
Fixed
The mention of her being a supporting character after XIII could be trimmed to a single mention like "She is also a supporting character in the sequels "Final Fantasy XIII-2 (2011), and Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII (2013)."
Should be fixed.
I'd suggest adding a brief mention of her other appearances in the lead such as the novel or the related games.
Should be fixed with the above.
Second paragraph should specify she was specifically created for FFXIII to avoid any other confusion.
Should be fixed.

Concept and creation

The first mention of FFXIII in the body should be linked.
Done.
"Vanille is a "l'Cie": humans cursed with magical powers and a task to complete." Seems kinda random to put it here unless there is more commentary.
Moved it down next to the commentary about her crystaline form.
Dates in references should be consistent. Simply add the tag to the lead and it will be fixed automatically.
Fixed

Voice casting

Specify what is Final Fantasy XIII Ultimania Omega
Fixed?
There is no need to spam references after Georgia van Cuylenburg unless there is another one.
Fixed

Appearances

I'd rename the subsection to "In the Final Fantasy XIII series" to avoid confusing the reader with the original game.
Done
Start the first paragraph by mentioning FFXIII in order to be written in a more outofuniverse form.
Fixed?
"NORA. After Nora" Is it the same group or another person? I'm not an expert in capitals but it should be consistent or specify more what is the Nora that dies to avoid similarities.
Fixed the wording here a bit.
Why are they fighting Bhunivelze?
I think I've fleshed that out a bit better? Honestly Lightning Returns gets *really* confusing there.

@Kung Fu Man: That's all until this section. Will comment on the rest since it's kinda long.Tintor2 (talk) 00:43, 8 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Hit up everything I could, lemme know if anything needs more attention.--Kung Fu Man (talk) 02:51, 8 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Kung Fu Man:

Reception

This is well written but several websites like Destructoid miss wikilinks in the prose.
Fixed.
I'd suggest moving the third paragraph of analysis to the middle since it keeps discussing her while the other one primarily focuses on her relationship with Fang.
Done.
Comment: I'm not really sure if voice acting comment should be moved to voice acting due previous experiences with Resident Evil reviews but I'll let it you decide.
I feel it's better with reception here, as it's a bit how the character was designed as well as voiced.

That's all.Tintor2 (talk) 03:09, 8 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Should be all set on those my dude!--Kung Fu Man (talk) 03:29, 8 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

It is reasonably well written.
a. (prose, spelling, and grammar):

b. (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a. (reference section):

b. (citations to reliable sources):

c. (OR):

d. (copyvio and plagiarism):
It is broad in its coverage.
a. (major aspects):

b. (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):

b. (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/fail:

(Criteria marked are unassessed)