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Talk:V. S. Srinivasa Sastri/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Jezhotwells (talk) 11:15, 9 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I shall be reviewing this article against the Good Article criteria, following its nomination for Good Article status.

Checking against GA criteria

[edit]
GA review (see here for criteria)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS):
    Early life and educational career: Srinivasa Sastri was born in the town of Valangaiman, Kumbakonam taluk. Need to spell out that this in Tamil Nadu, southern India, here and in the lead.
    I've reworded the statement to Valangaiman, Madras Presidency, India. Hope this is fine with you-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    with a first class in English and Sanskrit. - first class degree?
    Reworded accordingly-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    On completion of his graduation, ... - on graduation.
    Reworded accordingly-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    Srinivasa Sastri married Parvathi in 1885. Parvathi who?
    All I could gather is that Parvathi is the name of the woman Sastri married. As far as the available sources suggest, I don't think she is related to someone big-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Well if you are going to mention such a significant venet as his marriage it needs sourcing. If you can't source something like this remove it from the artcile. Jezhotwells (talk) 20:25, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I could find enough sources to conclude that he married a woman called Parvathi in 1885. Please see [1]. But I do not have any detailed information about her or her lineage.-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 01:32, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. His grand-daughter Kausalya is the wife of renowned Indian scientist and nephew of Sir C. V. Raman, S. Ramaseshan. This doesn't belong in a section entitle Early life.
Initially, I wanted to create a section called "Family" but later I chose to add the stuff to "Early life" as I wish to avoid creating one or two-line paragraphs that would not conform to WP:MOS.-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 01:39, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. Politics: Suggest wikilink Co-operative movement to Cooperative
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    Srinivasa Sastri met Gopal Krishna Gokhale for the first time in 1906. - need to explain who this person was.
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    He opposed the Rowlatt Act, explain impact of this act.
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    In 1919, he was appointed member of the Privy Council of the United Kingdom. - a member
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    In 1922, Sastri resigned his membership of the Indian National Congress and established the Indian Liberal Party along with Tej Bahadur Sapru. - Why?
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 05:58, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    ... he accompanied Annie Besant on another visit to England demanding Home Rule for India. Anoher vists? When was the previous visit?
    International Delegations: Srinivasa Sastri was a part of the delegation of Indian moderates who visited England in 1919 - perhapsd this is teh first visit. Consider the chronological arrangemnet here.
    ... refused to treat Srinivasa Sastri on par with European delegate. delegates?
    Fixed-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 10:15, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    However, on Srinivasa Sastri's departure from South Africa as Agent ... Agent of what?
    Srinivasa Sastri was deputed to the Federated Malay States in 1937, to report on the conditions of the Indian labourers in the country. - deputed seems rather clumsy.
    During the early part of Sastri's tenure, a number of segregationary laws and legislations were passed targeting Indians and Indian immigrants in South Africa. - legislations should be singular. Segregationary should be wikilinked to Racial segregation.
    The period also witnessed the establishment of a number of trade unions and organisations. organisations is rather vague.
I've removed the term "organisations". I feel the usage of the term "trade unions" is adequate enough-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 12:14, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. During the last few months of Sastri's tenure, racial relations, however, began to worsen. Sastri campaigned against segregationary legislations and got the Class Area Bill segregating Indians withdrawn. legislation should be singular. This whole paragraph should be restructured, to flow better.
    Later life and death: Annamalai University Where is this?
    The committee submitted its report in three months recommending the retention of the existing Sanskrit loanwords in Tamil and rejecting the need for them to be replaced. after three months might be better.
    Fixed-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 10:15, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    In January, Srinivasa Sastri was advised to get admitted in the General Hospital, Madras. admitted to would be correct.
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 10:15, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    He eventually died on April 17, 1946 at the age of 76. Of what?
    I did an extensive search on Google. While sources do mention that he fell ill in early 1946 and died on April 17, 1946, none of the sources mention what his illness was.-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 10:15, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    Honours: In 1937, the then Governor of Madras offered to make Sastri the Acting Chief Ministership of Madras Presidency but Sastri declined the offer. to make .... Mimistership? Also I note that ref #31 [2] titles Sastri as C H, (Companion of Honour), surely this should be mentioned.
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 10:15, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    The Lead does not fully summarise the artcile. Please read WP:LEAD.
Well, I feel it's quite comprehensive and I've expanded it a bit more. Could you please point out the specific points which the lead misses out.-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 12:05, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. Dates: Better to use the British English form - if only to reduce the number of commas in sentences such as On May 27, 1927, at the behest of Mahatma Gandhi, Lord Irwin, the Viceroy of India, appointed Srinivasa Sastri as India's first Agent to the Republic of South Africa.
    Done-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 14:49, 21 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    'Overall: Please go through the article line by line to improve the prose, avoid sentences starting with the same phrase and make the prose flow better.
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    Ref #16 is a dead link
    I am able to access this link. I do not understand what is the problem that you face-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 06:03, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Ah, it is working now. Jezhotwells (talk) 20:25, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. What makes ref #3 [3] from a industrial company website a reliable source?
    I chose the above url as a source because it appeared to direct to a journal published by the particular company. I assumed that since it is from a published source it might be more reliable that stuff posted on the company webpage. Anyway, I'll search if there are alternative sources and intimate you.-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 06:07, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    Ref #7 [4] Triplicane Union Cooperative Society in the article, Triplicane Urban Co-operative Society in the source.
    The Hindu is a widely-read Indan newspaper with a strong reputation for credibility-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 06:07, 15 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
My point is that the paper same Urban, the artcile says Union. I am not questioning the source, I wondered why the statement in the Wikipedia artcile contradicts the source. Jezhotwells (talk) 20:25, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks a lot for pointing it out. I've rectified it. I am sorry about the mistake.-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 01:39, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. I assume good faith for all offline sources.
  1. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  2. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  3. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  4. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
    Licensing and tagging OK. Is it possible to re-arrange the photos so that the New York post artcile appears in the section above where it is relevant.
    WEll is it possible? Jezhotwells (talk) 20:25, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I agree with your concerns over the placement of the images. Right at this moment, I am pondering over space-issues. Should I do away with the Jan Smuts image?-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 01:39, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Oh well! I've interchanged the images. I guess there is nothing wrong in moving Jan Smuts' image to the section "Agent to South Africa".-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 12:11, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:
    OK, on hold for seven days whilst concerns above are addressed. Jezhotwells (talk) 12:48, 9 January 2010 (UTC) [reply]
    Hold extended til 23 January when a decision will be made. Jezhotwells (talk) 20:25, 16 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks a lot for being so patient! And I'm sorry for the delay I've caused-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 12:12, 17 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  1. OK, thanks for your hard work. I am happy to confirm that this article is deserving of Good Article status. Jezhotwells (talk) 16:16, 23 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    Thanks a lot to you. :-)-The EnforcerOffice of the secret service 06:05, 24 January 2010 (UTC)[reply]
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