Talk:Life of Pi (film)/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: Bait30 (talk · contribs) 23:40, 9 October 2020 (UTC)
Hi, I'd like to review this if you don't mind. Life of Pi is one of my favorite novels (along with Siddhartha) and I enjoyed the movie a lot. I'm pretty new at GA stuff so don't hesitate to let me know if you think I messed up. Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 23:40, 9 October 2020 (UTC)
- I'll review prose first going down the page by section, then do images, then do references last. Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 07:09, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
Lead/infobox
[edit]- "Directed by Ang Lee, the film's adapted screenplay was written by David Magee, and it stars": the structure of the sentence suggests that Ang Lee directed the screenplay, not the film. On the same note, "it" refers to the screenplay when it should refer to the film. (1a)
- Reworded. Rusted AutoParts 02:25, 13 October 2020 (UTC)
- "51st New York Film Festival": should be 50th (2)
- "The film had its worldwide premiere as the opening film of the 51st New York Film Festival at both the Walter Reade Theater and Alice Tully Hall in New York City on September 28, 2012.": I feel like this whole sentence is relatively significant information that should be in the body of the text, but currently is not. (1b)
- "It was nominated for three Golden Globe Awards which included the Best Picture – Drama and the Best Director and won the Golden Globe Award for Best Original Score.": would be more concise if changed to "It was nominated for three Golden Globe Awards, including Best Picture – Drama and Best Director, and won for Best Original Score." (1a)
- "The film was shot between": Either "The film was shot in" or "Filming was split between" would be more clear. (1a)
- "India, Taiwan and Montreal, Quebec": would be better to remove Quebec. Might be confusing because of the commas and the fact it's in a list. (1a)
- Infobox "country" section: this isn't within the scope of the review but why are there five references for United States?
- I can only surmise there was a big to-do over this. I am seeing a small discussion on the talk page about it. Rusted AutoParts 02:17, 13 October 2020 (UTC)
- Infobox budget and box office: it would probably be ok to remove the references here since they're cited in the "box office" section.
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 07:09, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
- I do feel it’s necessary to keep sources there too, if only to keep consistent with other film articles that source the box office in the infobox. Rusted AutoParts 02:17, 13 October 2020 (UTC)
Plot
[edit]- There's nothing wrong within the scope of GA, but to me it seems like there's quite a bit of MOS:OVERLINKING in this section and the lead so far. For example, I don't think Pi Patel needs to be linked to the Pi Patel section of the article for the novel, especially when that section has less information about Pi Patel than the article for the film does. "Acidic" does not need to be linked. "Adapted screenplay" in the lead does not need to be linked. I looked at multiple other articles for movies based on adapted screenplays, and none of them linked to film adaptation.
Done
Cast
[edit]- Elie Alouf as Francis: the note should be moved to a separate Notes section at the end of the article. (1b)
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 07:32, 10 October 2020 (UTC)
- I just took it out, I didn't see it's purpose. Rusted AutoParts 02:53, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
Production
[edit]- "write an adapted screenplay": it's kind of redundant. It's not like he's going to write an unadapted screenplay. More concise to just say "write a screenplay. (1a)
- "Jeunet began writing the adapted screenplay": same as above. (1a)
- "Jeunet eventually left the project.": should have a source. (2)
- "we're the vessels": unlink vessels. Vessels in this case isn't even referring to watercraft. It's referring to a person who has a particular quality or who is used for a particular purpose. (1)
- "play the adult Pi, Adil Hussain would play Pi's father, while Tabu was in talks to play the role of Pi's mother.": grammar. Should be "play the adult Pi, and Adil Hussain..." (1a)
- "and concluded in Montreal, Quebec, Canada": this unnecessary disambiguation can be made more concise. (1a)
- Could you clarify this a bit for me? Rusted AutoParts 02:58, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
- I feel like since Montreal is clearly the primary topic, there's no need to say Montreal, Quebec, Canada. Just Montreal is good per MOS:GEO. Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 03:14, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
- Could you clarify this a bit for me? Rusted AutoParts 02:58, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
- "The R&H VFX (Visual Effects) Supervisor": unlink VFX as it's already linked above. Also, "Visual Effects" and "Supervisor" should be lowercase (1a)
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 02:09, 12 October 2020 (UTC)
Music
[edit]- section seems good to me
Distribution
[edit]- "Life of Pi's financial success had been under review.": not sure what this means. (1a)
- I rephrased to "was uncertain". Rusted AutoParts 23:23, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
- "It looks like chances are very slim that the film will earn back its production and marketing costs let alone turn a profit.": I think you need to duplicate the ref over here since it's a direct quote. not sure though. (2b)
- "including a one-hour making-of special entitled A Filmmaker's Epic Journey, two featurettes focusing on the film's visual effects, as well as two": there should be an "and" instead of a comma between "Journey" and "two" (1a)
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 02:18, 12 October 2020 (UTC)
Reception
[edit]- "in Australia, Chile": should be "in Australia and Chile," (1a)
- "the biggest Hollywood hit of the year": kinda peacock-y. (1b)
- Reworded, does that work? Rusted AutoParts 22:37, 16 October 2020 (UTC)
- "and is now the tenth highest grossing Hollywood release of all time": MOS:RELTIME. (1b)
- Reworded, does that work? Rusted AutoParts 22:37, 16 October 2020 (UTC)
- Everything you have done thus far is good. Article is definitely on track to becoming a GA. Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 19:03, 17 October 2020 (UTC)
- Reworded, does that work? Rusted AutoParts 22:37, 16 October 2020 (UTC)
- "Roger Ebert of the Chicago Sun-Times gave Life of Pi four out of four": is it four out of four stars? or just a four out of four? (1a)
- "as well as "one of the best films of the year."": citation needs to go here as well. (2)
- "Comparatively": this means "relatively", and that doesn't really make sense in this context. Maybe "similarly"? (1a)
- Marjolaine Gout and AO Scott quotes: same as above. should be a citation after each quotation. (2)
- Last paragraph of critical reception ("The film has been described as... ) is a run-on sentence. Also, is "(see Gaia hypothesis)" supposed to be within the quote? (1a)
- I believe I've fixed it. Rusted AutoParts 00:14, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- In the "Accolades" section, everything after the Academy Awards section is unreferenced. (2)
- Trimmed out the unsourced, sourced Golden Globes. If there's a separate article for awards the Accolades section is typically reserved to go over the more notable awards. Rusted AutoParts 00:14, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- "Despite the Oscar for Best Visual": might be more clear to say "Despite winning the Oscar..." (1a)
- "green key colour": what is the MOS:ENGVAR for this article? Dates are MDY, but this is a Commonwealth spelling for colo(u)r.
- I took the U out. Rusted AutoParts 00:14, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- "in order to raise awareness for what is happening to the effects industry.": what is happening? the connection between how this issue, which seems localized to R&H, relates to some industry-wide issue is not clear/apparent. (1a)
- Reworded. Rusted AutoParts 00:14, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- " In an April 7, 2011, ACA monitor, Gina Johnson, wrote that "last week we almost killed King".": The quotes in this paragraph need sources directly after. Also, who or what is "King"? It is not mentioned anywhere else in the article. (1a/2)
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 02:48, 12 October 2020 (UTC)
- Added an unquoted line to clarify who King is. Rusted AutoParts 00:14, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
Images
[edit]- Suraj Sharma: the caption is kind of ambiguous as to whether it is Pi or Sharma who is 16. Maybe something like "Suraj Sharma was cast as the 16 year old Pi Patel" (6b)
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 02:54, 12 October 2020 (UTC)
- Clarified. Rusted AutoParts 00:15, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
References
[edit]Reference numbers based on this version
- 3: "Film at Lincoln Center" would be a better choice for website.
Done
- 12: WP:DEADREF. Found the new url [1]
- I took it out of the lead in general. Rusted AutoParts 00:21, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- 24, 25, 87 and 91: citation style not consistent with rest of refs.
- I'm not sure I follow on this. Rusted AutoParts 00:21, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- I was wrong about 24. But 25 (The Globe and Mail ref), 87 (the Faunce paper), and 91 (the VFX protest source) don't use the same CS1 style templates as the rest of the article. It's ok though because it turns out it's not within the scope of GA reviews. Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 17:16, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
- I'm not sure I follow on this. Rusted AutoParts 00:21, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- 41: should include the actual video creator in the reference, The Daily, not just YouTube.
- 44: dead link. new link [2]
Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 03:51, 12 October 2020 (UTC)
- 44 doesn't appear dead to me. Rusted AutoParts 00:21, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
- It was "Vfx team dares to take tiger by the tail" from Variety. It's ok, I fixed it. Bait30 Talk 2 me pls? 17:16, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
- 44 doesn't appear dead to me. Rusted AutoParts 00:21, 18 October 2020 (UTC)
I shall begin work on these points tomorrow. Rusted AutoParts 05:27, 12 October 2020 (UTC)