Talk:Lapitch the Little Shoemaker/GA1

GA Review

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Starting review. Jezhotwells (talk) 22:31, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Quick fail criteria assessment

The article completely lacks reliable sources – see Wikipedia:Verifiability.
The topic is treated in an obviously non-neutral way – see Wikipedia:Neutral point of view.
There are cleanup banners that are obviously still valid, including cleanup, wikify, NPOV, unreferenced or large numbers of fact, clarifyme, or similar tags.
The article is or has been the subject of ongoing or recent, unresolved edit wars.
The article specifically concerns a rapidly unfolding current event with a definite endpoint.

No problems when checking against quick fail criteria. Move on to main review. Jezhotwells (talk) 22:34, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Checking against GA criteria

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose):
Plot: here are a few issues with the prose style here:
Eventually, the two of them visit a young squirrel..., implies other things happened, probably best to drop eventually. Keep it simple.

An awkward raccoon,.. Awkward?

#The road ahead, however, does not go smoothly: Perhaps their journey, unless you are talking about the state of the road.

Because of Dirty Rat—"king of the Underworld" as he is known—Lapitch wakes up shocked to see his boots gone. Clumsy, rewrite in plain English.

As he looks for the shiny pair, perhaps as he looks for the boots, is it important that they are shiny?

The mouse later gives it to the raccoon, after he falls off Dirty Rat's wagon Confusing, which raccoon? Who fell off the wagon?

but the villagers make Melvin a suspect in the area's recent robbery sting. So Melvin has joined the group?. Rewrite make a suspect in ...robbery sting. This is not good English.

The clouds clear as soon as everyone celebrates. Is this important?
In short please rewrite this whole section in good, clear English. If you cannot then enlist the aid of the WP:Guild of copyeditors. Jezhotwells (talk) 22:57, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Production:
During production, the crew used cel cameras dating as far back as 1938, and made Ivana Brlić-Mažuranić's title character a mouse, amid a roster of anthropomorphic animals There are two diffrent subjects in this sentence, simpfly.

boasted is a weasel word.

In their only screen roles, child actors Ivan Gudeljević and Maja Rožman played the title character and his girlfriend respectively. Better in their debut roles, but they are just doing the voices right?, so hardly a screen role.
A handful of Canadian voice actors Handful? weasel word.
Release and reception:
Still, Lapitch went on to become the most successful theatrical release... Drop the word still.

an honour it still holds as of 2009. This dates the etxt, better to just drop it.

The Croatian unit, better Croatian arm or subsidiary.
Lapitch the Little Shoemaker became popular enough in Europe to warrant a television series, entitled Hlapićeve nove zgode in its native Croatia. Why did popularity in Europe make a Croatian TV series viable?
Lead. OK

So we are looking at a major copy edit here. Jezhotwells (talk) 22:57, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
b (MoS):
OK
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references):
Reference #6 is a dead link; as is reference #14; as is reference #26 which is to a dead geocities site, geocities hosts personal web pages, not a WP:RS
b (citations to reliable sources):
Reference #17 is to a blog, not allowable; #34 just says Amazon is selling the DVD, not release information; as noted above #26 is a geocities link which is not a RS. I assume good faith for the Croatian and Slovenian references. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
c (OR):
No evidence of OR. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
It is broad in its scope.
a (major aspects):
The article is broad in scope. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
b (focused):
and focussed. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
NPOV. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
It is stable.
No edit wars etc.:
Stable
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
Images are tagged and have suitable rationales. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Suitable captions. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Overall:
Pass/Fail:
OK, I am going to put this on hold whilst the above issues are addressed. If it is going to take a long time, please let me know. Jezhotwells (talk) 23:17, 25 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]

OK, no progress is being made so I will fail this now. Jezhotwells (talk) 02:48, 6 July 2009 (UTC)[reply]