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GA Review

[edit]
This review is transcluded from Talk:Kaga ikki/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Mr rnddude (talk · contribs) 09:50, 2 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]


Hi there I will be taking on the review of this article, expect a full review up by tomorrow (maybe later today). Mr rnddude (talk) 09:50, 2 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Rate Attribute Review Comment
1. Well-written:
1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct. All of the identified prose issues in the article have been rectified.
  • Lede
  • "The Kaga ikki controlled Kaga until being overrun by the forces of Oda Nobunaga in a series of campaigns lasting from 1573 to 1582." -> The Kaga ikki controlled Kaga until they were overrun by the forces of Oda Nobunaga in a series of campaigns lasting from 1573 to 1582.
  • History
  • Kaga Rebellion
  • "forced to take refuge in neighboring Etchū Province." -> either; forced to take refuge in neighboring Etchū, or, forced to take refuge in the neighboring Etchū province.
  • "their forces numbering from one hundred thousand and two hundred thousand." -> their forces numbering between one hundred thousand and two hundred thousand.
  • "overwhelmed him and trapped him" -> overwhelmed and trapped him
  • "In Masachika's place as shugo, the vassal families which opposed Masachika put forward his uncle, Yasakuta, who had previously been a shugo of the province." -> To replace Masachika a as shugo, The vassal families who had opposed Masachika put forward his uncle, Yasakuta, who had previously been a shugo of the province.
  • Rule from Oyama Gobo
  • "over Kaga, the next fifteen years still saw great political instability in Kaga..." -> over Kaga, the next fifteen years still saw great political instability in the province...
  • Conquest by Oda Nobunaga
  • "ten-year long campaign against the Ikkō-ikki" perhaps reduce the link to -> campaign against the Ikkō-ikki.
  • "this time with rapidity" -> this time more rapidly
  • "and in that November" -> and in November of that year
  • Governance
  • "Three sons of Rennyo, Rengo, Renkō, and Rensei..." -> Three sons of Rennyo; Rengo, Renkō, and Rensei...
  • "Kaga was subsumed..." -> Kaga was consumed... subsumed would mean that Kaga was absorbed into political instability rather than absorbed by politcal instability.



1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. The article is broken up into relevant sections, the lede gives a succinct summary of the the article's contents, weasel and puff words are absent from the article and the list incorporated in the infobox is appropriate without being overbearing. The article is not about a fictitious subject so MOS for fiction can be skipped.
  • Note; I have rectified all duplicate links within the article and have detected no disambiguation links that need resolving.
  • Correction; There is one minor issue that needs resolving first, several external links to sources don't work for me, these are;
  • Turnbull, Stephen (2005a). Samurai Commanders: 940–1576. 1. Oxford: Osprey Publishing. ISBN 9781841767437.
  • Turnbull, Stephen (2005b). Samurai Commanders: 1577–1638. 2. Oxford: Osprey Publishing. ISBN 9781841767444.
  • Turnbull, Stephen (2006). The Samurai and the Sacred. Oxford: Osprey Publishing. ISBN 9781846030215.
  • Turnbull, Stephen (2012). Japanese Fortified Temples and Monasteries AD 710–1062. Oxford: Osprey Publishing. ISBN 9781782000136.
  • The issue seems to be concentrated on Stephen Turnbull's works, all the other links have worked for me barring these.
2. Verifiable with no original research:
2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline. Information and links are provided for all of the references used in the correct section and properly and the sources are verifiable.
2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). All of the in-line citations come from reliable published secondary sources. No issues with this section currently exist.
2c. it contains no original research. My concerns about WP:OR have been addressed, the occasional mis-citation to the wrong page or book coupled with a single instance of inferred meaning was the cause for these concerns.
  • I have taken a look at Davis, Weinsteins, Blum and Solomon's works and have found no further issues with the paraphrasing used.
2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism. Earwig's copyvio detector rates it unlikely with a 6.5% confidence that there are any copyright violations. I myself will try to access a couple of the sources and confirm that copyvio's are indeed unlikely. Having looked at Weinstein, Blum, Davis and Solomon, I am reasonably confident that there are no copyvio's in the article.
3. Broad in its coverage:
3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic. As far as my research indicates and based on the article itself, the article covers all of the relevant topics related to the subject of the Kaga Ikko-ikki and the government they formed in Kaga province.
3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style). The article is focused specifically on the topic of the Kaga Ikki and does not stray far from topic at anytime.
4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each. I have no concerns with the neutrality of the article, it is free from weasel words and puffery and applies a neutral tone throughout.
5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. The article is in a stable condition, no edit-wars and no outstanding disputes on the article's talk page.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content. There is a single image in the article and it is appropriately tagged with the correct license, in this case CC-BY-SA 3.0.
6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. The caption is suitable for the image.
7. Overall assessment. My concerns have been addressed, particularly criterion 2c. For reference, in any re-examination, refer to this page's history and use the largest size of this page (in bytes) to look at any criterion 2c queries. Other than that, I am pleased with the caliber of work completed, good job. Easy pass for GA.

I will be using the above table to complete the review for this article. Mr rnddude (talk) 09:50, 2 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for this review. With the sourcing and original research issues, I may have cited the wrong pages, or summarized two works and only cited one, so I will look into these. I'm working almost 70 hours this week, so it might take some time before I can address all of the issues. Thanks again, --3family6 (Talk to me | See what I have done) 15:05, 2 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
3family6, not a problem, I believe that is the issue myself having been able to identify the occurrence of it in a couple of these places. I am happy to put the article on hold if that would help you, I am in no rush. Thanks for putting forth such a commendable amount of work in this article. Feel free to ping me if you need assistance with something or to notify me when you have rectified the issues. Mr rnddude (talk) 15:09, 2 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
I've fixed the grammar/prose issues and the external links. Now to the painstaking task of figuring out the improperly cited content.--3family6 (Talk to me | See what I have done) 22:27, 8 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@Mr rnddude:. I think I rectified all the remaining content issues Please review my changes. I found that many of the unsupported statements were mentioned in Solomon, and I had forgotten to cite him. And the one section did have content that I summarized inaccurately.--3family6 (Talk to me | See what I have done) 02:08, 9 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]