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Thank you @David notMD:, Flo is the key person who helped Holgate to get into the university when she moved to London. There are many available references. Would you mind giving me a suggestion on how to improve this section! Thank you!--Quinndo (talk) 01:19, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Unless Flo was a continuing and important influence in her life, do not mention Flo at all. Just state that Holgate attended the University of North London where she achieved a Bachelor's and Master's degree in ___. David notMD (talk) 11:13, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I cannot access the article, but I trust it describes the relationship. My critique was based on the mysterious mention of "Flo" with no details on who she is and why she was important. Does Flo have a last name? David notMD (talk) 11:31, 29 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you @David notMD:. "Early career" section was included to give a comprehensiveness of her career life. Would you mind giving suggestions for further improvement? Thank you! --Quinndo (talk) 01:26, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Take on board the advice regarding the article sounding like a resume, I understand you might be trying to meet a word count but not at the cost of losing the encyclopaedic tone. Well done on engaging in the talk page Quinndo --Carrolquadrio (talk) 02:26, 29 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I do not intend to edit this article anymore, but in my opinion the entire "View" section is semi-promotional bloat that needs to be deleted. She is neither a senior Australian politician or economist, nor a published feminist, so her opinions on these topics are not germane. Quoting what she has said at various venues adds nothing to her notability. David notMD (talk) 15:43, 1 June 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for all your support @David notMD:. Although she is not an economist and feminist, Holgate led Blackmores to become "one of the most successful exporters into China".[1] Holgate is notable for her Asian-focused strategy but I could not explicitly write this sentence. Therefore, I created a "View" section. This is not only a view of Holgate but also her business strategies, which makes her notable. Thank you!Quinndo (talk) 11:58, 2 June 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Today the reasons for the kerfuffle of her job ending came to light. The banking facilities at Australia Post had been re-contracted by those guys who received the watches. This is extremely important for the outerlying areas of Australia or for older people who cannot keep online banking secure, simply refusing to do that. So preserving the financial services by the big banks in the Post Offices is important, if we do not want people like wirecard or Greensill coming in. There was also a secret report about privatising the parcel service, which is important to Australia Post and to people. Holgate saw clearly that it was undesirable to go for that privatisation because these reduce services and the services that do remain become slack and more expensive, as it normally happens.
Holgate said in the interview that her deal secured important investment which the government might have made. That is probably referring to the banking service, not the parcel service. This could delay the privatisation of the post, surely Australia does not want to end up like America. She questioned the right to secrecy of the parcel service report. She did Australia a great service with the financial matters.
“In 2003, she came to Australia and worked for Telstra, which its precursor was Telecom Australia, as the Marketing direct...”
This is a very ugly construction. Either ‘...Telstra, whose precursor was Telecom etc.’ or, more simply, ‘...Telstra, formerly, Telecom etc.’
There are numerous other non-English or poor constructions in this piece which I would be pleased to point out and for which I could offer alternatives, if desired.
2001:8003:C063:8500:3DE4:EFF9:5DE3:C2B3 (talk) 21:57, 12 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]