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On the "phrasing" of the last paragraph of "Expatriates"

[edit]

I find that paragraph seriously problematic. It may not be a facts problem, but a phrasing problem, but in a way, it sounds even racist.

  • The Indian Fashion Industry also recruits models from Brazil as their approach to fashion is more professional and their exposure has been extensive.

I think the article should mention somehow that this was the opinion (and, importantly, it is an *opinion*) of a coreographer called Vidyun Singh, in the reference. Also, importantly, the article should not simply copy words from another place (is this not plagiarism?).

  • They are also recruited because

This part is added as a if introducing a "fact", but again, is just a connection to the continuation of Vidyun Singh, which goes on with the next words:

  • they are much less inhibited, so assignments which require them to don a bikini or a swimsuit are easier than for Indian girls.

[these are his words again. I find his opinion (at least a little) racist, and I'd find it nice if the article at least made it clear it is not necessarily a fact]

  • However they earn less than Indian models but the rates are at par with other parts of the world. The only difference is that they probably have to do three shows instead of one in India.[5]

Again... the bold words are an exact copy of the words or Tatiane Silveira (see next paragraph), a model, as written in the referred link.

(Her name is very likely Tatiane Silveira, not Silviera. That article makes several spelling mistakes in the names of the places -- e.g., referring to Porto Alegre as an literal Spanish translation "Puerto Allegre", or to São Paulo as "Sao Paolo".)

... still... I don't know what is the best way to fix these problems, so I am creating this discussion section here. Vaulttech (talk) 15:38, 11 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]