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The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:46, 10 June 2014 (UTC)

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2014 PBA Commissioner's Cup Finals

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Created/expanded by WayKurat (talk), PapaJeckloy (talk). Nominated by WayKurat (talk) at 09:06, 17 May 2014 (UTC).

  • Hook is over 200 characters. Yoninah (talk) 20:48, 5 June 2014 (UTC)
ALT1: ... that the Talk 'N Text Tropang Texters have not lost a game in the 2014 PBA Commissioner's Cup Finals, but were defeated in three games by the San Mig Super Coffee Mixers?
ALT2: ... that the Talk 'N Text Tropang Texters have not lost a game in the 2014 PBA Commissioner's Cup, but were defeated in three games by the San Mig Super Coffee Mixers in their finals series?
— Preceding unsigned comment added by WayKurat (talk • contribs) 05:19, 8 June 2014 (UTC)
  • Expansion new enough (for 17 May) and long enough. Self-nom has achieved three DYKs (according to talkpage archives) therefore no QPQ necessary. No problem with disambig links. I have tweaked ALT1 and ALT2 for grammar (content is unchanged). External links for citations #1 to #11 checked with article text for copyvio but none found. Issues: (1) Under the Rosters subheading, there are two external deadlinks on the right hand side of the tables, named "rosters." (2) Citation #1 is of no use; please replace it. (3) The language style of this article is not neutral. Non-neutral language includes: "scorching", "blazing", "steal" (wrong tense anyway), "roaring", "dominant", "stellar", "miraculous", "commanding", "horrible", "resounding". This is an encyclopaedia and not an entertainment medium, so please could you kindly re-write the article to simply tell us what the teams achieved and to exclude this type of language. The above words are only examples of non-neutral treatment of the subject, so you need to look carefully at all of the article. If you can resolve issues 1-3 then this nom should be good to go.--Storye book (talk) 19:57, 9 June 2014 (UTC)
  • Thanks for the review, I have neutralized most of the texts at the series summary section, removed the peacock statements from the other editor, and removed the dead links. I hope this is now ok. -WayKurat (talk) 00:38, 10 June 2014 (UTC)
  • Thank you, WayKurat. Issues 1 and 2 are now dealt with. Re issue 3, neutrality: "stellar" and "miraculous" are still there and need to be removed. I have realised that I accidentally missed out an important point above. The hook is not repeated all-in-one-piece in the text, with its citations next to it. This is a complex article and I have not been able to extract all the pieces of hook for checking. If you could put the hook in the header or at the end for us - with citations - then we can check it out properly. I hope when these two things are done, this nom should be good to go. --Storye book (talk) 09:44, 10 June 2014 (UTC)
Okay, I removed those words as well, and added a sentence at the at the introduction paragraph regarding the hook, with the needed sources. -10:47, 10 June 2014 (UTC)
  • Thank you WayKurat. The hook now checks out online with citations 2, 3. 4. 5 and 6 as detailed in the header. All other issues are resolved. Good to go (at last!) --Storye book (talk) 11:14, 10 June 2014 (UTC)
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